3 Downright Evil Strategies for Manipulating People
No one will know you’re pulling the strings.
Tired of not getting what you want from people? Not getting what you want? Having to hide your greatness?
Collaborating with people who don’t see your greatness the way you see it is frustrating.
Whether it’s someone at work, your spouse, your kids, or your friends, a little manipulation goes a long way in making your life easier.
The idea of manipulating people is taboo in today’s society. We’d rather believe that no one is manipulating us. That we are immune to being pressured into doing things that we don’t want to do.
This couldn’t be farther from the truth. The fact is, you are being manipulated all day every day, and you’re doing nothing about it in return.
Why should you care about manipulating people?
- So your ideas get the chance they need to succeed.
- So your life is easier. You shouldn’t have to deal with the horrible ideas of others.
- So you have the power to take advantage of the most powerful resource on the planet: human capital.
- So people will make your dreams come true for you. You can just relax.
If you’re not manipulating people, you’re the one being manipulated. That’s the unfortunate truth. Every ad you watch, every tweet you scroll past, every article you read is finely tuned to manipulate where you place your attention.
Then, once they have your attention, they do everything they can to hypnotize you into making the decision they want you to make.
This is a power that you can, and have an obligation, to harness for yourself.
But how? How can we become experts in creating social currency?
These three strategies, although only scratching the surface, will put you on the right track.
Be extremely empathetic
Empathy is the key to the hearts and minds of other people.
Without it, you will never even have a chance to get people to connect with you.
The people you’re manipulating can never feel manipulated. They can never feel like you are in charge. In fact, you’re not in charge. They are. For that reason, you need extreme empathy.
By empathy, I mean seeing the entire world from the point of view of the other person. Actually imagining yourself in their shoes, and thinking only about what they want and desire.
If you can accomplish this, you don’t have to guess what they like or want. You will know.
Without empathy, you will run into brick wall after brick wall. Never experiencing a real connection with anybody. You will be known as the obvious manipulator and people will avoid you at all costs.
Even you will avoid you at all costs. If you don’t have empathy for other people, you will have zero empathy for yourself. Forcing yourself to go through life without any understanding of who you really are. Driven by only ambition and delusion.
Care only for the other person
Take the words “I”, “me”, “my” out of your vocabulary completely. You don’t matter. The only thing that matters are the people around you.
Show, time and time again, that you’re willing to put yourself aside for the sake of others. Always thinking of yourself last.
This will cause people to gravitate towards you. It will make them feel safe and secure in your presence. Like you are an extension of them.
If at any time you show people that you care about yourself more than them, they will begin to distance themselves from you and resent you. Guaranteeing that you never have a chance to influence their decision making because they will always have their guard up with you.
Avoid making any conversation about you. Don’t talk about yourself at all. Instead, only ask questions about the person you are talking to. Don’t interrupt them. Just listen.
The most generous thing you can do to any person is to give them your complete attention. By giving your attention all the time and asking for nothing in return, they will feel indebted to you.
When you finally do have something to say that requires them to pay attention they will listen with extreme intensity because they owe it to you.
Never break (good) character
The most important aspect of influencing decisions is your reputation.
If you’re presenting an idea to a person you’ve known for a while, your reputation will determine whether that idea is good or not. Not the quality of the idea itself.
If you have a reputation for pressuring people into making decisions, they will see you coming from a mile away and render you useless.
To solve this problem, you need to manage your reputation. You need to put in place a reputation that acts as an asset and not a liability. A reputation that gives your ideas more attention than they might otherwise deserve.
How do you create that reputation?
A reputation is created over thousands of tiny interactions with people. Over time those thousands of micro-interactions build up and compound into your reputation.
Other than caring only for other people and nothing for yourself (last section), the aspects of a good reputation are: consistent honesty and kindness, great work ethic and accountability, level-headedness and calm confidence, and a constant smile.
Add those qualities into your daily character and watch as time passes and people become drawn to your and your ideas.
Final Thoughts
Does this advice sound familiar?
It’s because if this article was titled, 3 Ways to Be a Great Leader and Team Player, it would be exactly the same.
At the end of the day, the best way to get the things you want in your life is to be a person that other people like to have around. Someone they like helping because you’ve already taken so much time to help them.
People are hard to trick and manipulate. They are much easier to lead.
